Rachel and Sarah have been best friends since they were eight. They finish each other's sentences, exchange outfits, share private jokes, and always know the other's secret crush. When Sarah decided she liked Jeremy from the class next door, Rachel was the first one she told. So when Sarah showed up at a gathering one night, she was surprised to see Jeremy in the corridor tickling Rachel, her laughing and trying only half-heartedly to make it out of his grasp.

When Lauren and Amanda volunteered to be the "managers" of the basketball team, they had no idea it would be so much fun. They got to know a lot of the players and became particularly friendly with one of the guys, Greg, who frequently came over to chat with them. As luck would have it, Lauren got to sit next to him on the bus on the way home from a game. Eventually, Greg asked Lauren to go to a movie, Amanda was crushed.

Sophie and David met at the school canteen and had been hanging out ever since. They were on the verge of becoming more than friends when she got a bad case of flu and had to stay home for six weeks. In the meantime, Sophie's friend Allison decided she thought David was cute and moved in on him. When Sophie finally came back to school, much to her dismay, she discovered that Allison and David were more or less dating.

All three sets of friends ran into the same roadblock in their relationship: they liked the same guy. You spend so much time around friends and classmates during school, sooner or later it's bound to happen. So what do you do if it happens to you?

If you're the odd one out, do you disown your rival and vow never speak to her again? Or, on the flip side, if the guy your best friend has a crush on starts showing interest in you and you think you might like him, do you respond positively or do you rebuff his advances in loyalty to her? If you find yourself in this dilemma, take a deep breath and think about the following before taking action.

• Be honest with yourself and with your rival. Talk it out. No matter which side of the equation you're on, how you handle the situation is going to depend on how much you value your friendship. Who do you care about more, the guy or her? Try not to be short-sighted, think about down the road and if you'll still want her to be in your life.
• If it's her he likes and not you, give her points for her openness and understanding or lack thereof. If she's upfront with you, that may be reason to cut her some slack--she seems to be trying, after all. But if she's spending a lot of time with him behind your back, or if she's treating you unfairly, it might be time to sever ties-that's probably not the kind of person you want in your life. Look at it as a chance to enhance other friendships.
• If it's one of those long-term crushes, be straight with yourself about the chances of the two of you ending up together. Is anything ever really going to happen? If you guess the answer is no, then maybe it's time to give someone else a turn.
• If he and your friend become a couple, recognize that you can't (or couldn't) control the outcome and move on. Yes, it's frustrating but true...you can't make someone like you, and you can't dissuade him from liking someone else. Sure, there are ways to influence what happens: you can send out signals to a guy, you can be friendly or open, but sooner or later he has to decide who he wants to date. If you make a huge issue out of it, you run the risk of looking like a drama queen, or worse, bitter.

Dating can be a blast, but be careful not to blow its importance out of proportion. The truth is most guys come and go. If you and your friend like the same guy but you both handle the conflict with sensitivity, then you may be lucky enough to stay friends and weather the storm.